unintentionally creepy old songs

After all, if you ask me, there have been a lot of (probably unintentionally) scary songs on the radio lately... Iggy Azalea — "Black Widow" (feat. It's hard to say what's more disturbing about this scene: that the snowman is likely some sort of cannibal, that his mouth is lined with sideways black teeth, or that the squatting combined with the arrangement of the bowl in front of him sort of implies that he's endlessly consuming his own snow-feces. Every move you make. If by some miracle Martin hadn't accidentally glimpsed the void and gone mad before crafting the Ondine swimming dolls, he sure as hell did afterward. Tom Maxwell (Squirrel Nut Zippers, The Minor Drag) shares some tracks that freak him out. Here’s What’s Happening Outside of Famous Music Album Covers By @igor.lipchanskiy Do you want to summon the Old Gods? This ritual grinds men into pasta. Some versions of the song end here, but Died for Love (as performed here by Martin and Eliza Carthy) continues, with a verse in which her father enters her bedroom to find her "hanging by a rope", with a note attached to her chest asking him to bury her with marble stones at her head and feet, with a snow-white dove in the middle, "just to let the world know that I died for love.". Cold Haily Rainy Night (or Cold Blow and a Rainy Night, Let Me In This Ae Nicht and even The Laird o' Windy Wa's) has retained its potency as a stark contrast between what people will say to get what they want, and how they will behave once they get it. And if you love crazy foreign versions of American toys, you'll love Robertcop. Just showing it to a kid has to be some sort of crime, at least on par with flashing. The concept was stretched a little too far. We're not sure why every single set of facial features includes wide, unblinking eyes full of hypnotic terror, but here you go: VintageTVCommercials Additionally, "Blue Velvet" has always seemed a bit disturbing since David Lynch's eponymous film. "And wonder why/My limbs spread wide? Did somebody read the Book of Creation backward on the winter solstice? Posted by. Quiz: Have you been getting these lyrics wrong all this time? She proposes marriage, but he's not interested, puts his hat back on and heads out into the storm, leaving her reputation in tatters. 12 comments. Ninety nine red balloons. This cover of the theme song from Roman Polanski's … So it wasn't so much "Mr. I've always thought The Beatles' "Honey Pie" was pretty creepy. Like all good stories, folk music is largely about three things: sex, death and politics. They could have made him extend his hand, they could have made him tip his hat -- hell, they could have made that pig's mouth open up in a death rattle when you hit the switch, and it still would have been less disturbing than Paddy extruding his grimy black tongue to lick the face of his latest porcine victim. Potato Head" as it was "Mr. Collection of Random Disembodied Facial Parts" -- the perfect gift for Little Timmy, who just can't seem to keep a cat alive. That would be ridiculous. In 1867, toymaker, inventor, and probable serial child murderer Charles M. Crandall created these stacking acrobat toys called Crandall's Acrobats.These leering, pasty-faced performers looked less like fun-loving tumblers mid routine and more like they were trying to combine themselves to form some sort of molestation Voltron. Want more creepy animatronics? They're kind of like LEGOs, except you build people instead of pirate ships, and one of the most vital pieces in every set is a burning but impotent hatred behind the eyes. Our names are Death, Destroyer of Childhood.". Matty Groves (as sung here by Ben Nicholls) is the story of a young man who catches the eye of the local lord's wife - in Sandy Denny's version of the song with Fairport Convention, he's Lord Donald, but the names and song titles change often. A high school teacher twice the age stalks a blind female student all over school while lip-synching to the song. What's that? share. To muffle cries/When I stab eyes.". This page has been archived and is no longer updated. DON'T TOUCH HER HAND. Mystery solved. The song - as performed by Jeannie Robertson, Steeleye Span, Planxty and The Imagined Village - tells the story of a handsome soldier or traveller stuck outside the window of a young woman on a rotten evening. Check out the artists we're taking to SXSW! She then meets two babies in the entrance to a church, and tells them she'd treat them wonderfully if they were hers. In 2011 he was named as the world's most unintentionally creepy Christmas decoration by Cracked.com. Their heads, bodies, arms, and legs were all interchangeable, so the police never quite knew which one was responsible for the abductions. The plastic version we think of today wasn't produced until 1964, which meant children had 12 long years to spend lying awake at night, wondering exactly how much their corn hated them, and knowing the answer was at least "more than anything.". I would expect my boyfriend to pay the bills too if he was the one who ran them up. By Alex Fletcher Lionel Ritchie's "Hello", it's creepy in a funny way. ... it's no wonder we learned to fear the unseen. 0. The shit-devouring sideways-mouthed living profanity is German? Toys that almost certainly contain some sort of ironic curse aren't your idea of a fun little gift for the kids back home? Tracy's Toys I'm talking about the kind of songs that are about entirely different things, but lyrically give you weird vibes 5 things we learned from Bros' chat on Radio 2, How Bring Me the Horizon became one of the UK’s biggest bands, Sign in to the BBC, or Registerif (require.s.contexts._.config.paths['idcta']) {require(['idcta/idcta-1'], function(idcta) {if (idcta && typeof idcta.addUserOrigin === 'function') {idcta.addUserOrigin('id4-cta-6aa135bb-3515-42cc-9a64-b89dd54802b7');}});}, Listen to Nancy Kerr in session for World on 3. 7 emotional songs by musicians who miss their father, 10 film soundtrack moments that’ll have you crying in your popcorn. Haha, OK. Now we know that history is fucking with us. The one below bears the inscription "What wonder, Miss/May be in this?/Make me free/and you'll see. Famously used in the soundtrack to Halloween II and subsequent iterations of the horror movie franchise, the lullaby croon of this single by The Chordettes is … Four Unintentionally Creepy Songs — To Play with the Lights Off. There's no way that your material desire and the spark of human creativity will bring them to life so they can steal your blood. The true “stalker’s anthem.”. But this song from the 1918 trenches didn't make the cut, probably because it portrays the hierarchy of army life in quite a brutal light. What A Lovely War retold the history of the First World War using popular songs of the time as a darkly comic way of satirically retelling the story of the conflict. Matty, who is naked, strikes the first blow, but is immediately killed, and Lord Donald then asks his wife which of the two she prefers. The original video was posted two months after the 15-year-old went missing. Unfortunately, they've been difficult to find ever since the manufacturer released a recall notice that just read, "Burn them. This queasy tale of infanticide has been sung by everyone from Cecilia Costello to The Dubliners (who recorded a version called Weile Weile Waile) and Nancy Kerr. Quiz: How many of these Mastermind music questions can you answer? Related Reading: There's a secret conspiracy hiding behind every 90s toy commercial. She says dead Matty, so Lord Donald kills her too, and buries the two lovers in the same grave, with her on top, because she's posher. Simple: "I'm Death I come to take the soul / Leave the body and leave it cold / To draw up the flesh off of the frame / Dirt and worm both have a claim.". I'm tasting your soul ...". Unintentionally Funny Songs. Also known as Conversations with Death, this song comes from the Appalachian mountains, wellspring of country music. In this case, it's 24-year-old tobacco plantation owner William Zantzinger, who rapped Hattie Carroll with his cane for not serving his drink fast enough. The Police – “Mother” A crazed, hallucinatory diatribe that sounds like it’s ricocheting off the walls … Jack-in-the-boxes have been teaching children about the horrors of the uncanny valley since the 16th century. Kobe dolls were carved out of wood, featured a mechanism that made their mouths open or their tongues and eyes bug out, and may have been designed as a passive-aggressive response to imperialism. Discover it here. Radio 1 Live Music - Bring Me The Horizon, Tom Walker & Red Hot Chilli Pipers - Leave A Light On. Worth Point At night he prank calls her and mocks her handicap by singing the line "Hello, is it me you are looking for" and then hangs up. "Here, child, there is a tiny man imprisoned in this box. Incase you're curious, that song is, "good bye horses" by Q Lazzarus. If everything in this scenario is on the up and up, there is absolutely no reason for Paddy to stick his whole tongue out toward that pig's face just to take your coin. One day this lady was breastfeeding her kid in full view at her table and of course I was the only one available to take her drink out to her, so I take her coffee out to her and try like hell to avoid eye contact. Surprise! save hide report. know any unintentionally creepy songs? The singer is romanticizing obsessive stalking. “My Friend, My Friend” – Phish. In this documentary, made by Howard Sounes, author of Down the Highway: The Life of Bob Dylan, we find out more about the case from first hand witnesses, and even hear from Zantzinger himself, who turns out not to be much of a Dylan fan. Sex, death and politics. Of course you do! It looks like the Thing is practicing its breaststroke. Each version tends to end in a similar way, with the singer realising he's bound for prison, and maybe the gallows, and also most certainly for eternal damnation. For those unfamiliar with the prolific jam band, the lyrics to their … It's the song of a desperate, ill person begging for their life, with Death himself boasting that he will shut the body down, and why? Potato Head hasn't always been the lovable subliminal advocate of plastic surgery that we know today. There might be a lot of carousing along the way, and there may be some discussion of farming or the occasional comedic skit to tickle your fancy, but the principal themes remain constant and they are always delivered with rude gusto. 4. If your gullible child actually makes the terrible mistake of looking in the drawer, she is immediately soul-swapped with the snowman and takes his place on the Throne of Infinite Foulness. It's a tale of a woman pining for her true love who has set out to sea and not returned. 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Also known as Hanged I Shall Be, The Oxford Tragedy, The Oxford Girl, The Wexford Girl, The Butcher Boy and many others, this song - variants of which date back to the 1700s - is one of many murder ballads in the folk canon that follow a similar pattern. Seriously, that skeletal cherub up there is one magical life-giving lightning strike away from an unstoppable murder spree. Desperate to find him, she sets out to sea herself and meets the Queen's ship. Creepy lyrics: "There was an old lady who swallowed a fly, I don't know why she swallowed a fly, perhaps she'll die!". He begs to come inside to get warm ("oh my hat is frozen to my head, my feet are like two lumps of lead"), and despite the risk of discovery, she eventually lets him in and one thing leads to another. 84% Upvoted. As Joan Bakewell explains in this report, the 1960s musical Oh! Outraged, the Lord finds the couple in bed, and insists that Matty fight. I would have preferred a greater number of the songs to be primarily either unintentionally creepy or songs that are deceptively happy sounding. Well, they were for 19th century tourists, who bought tons of them in the port city of Kobe, Japan. Abductors and captives end up in the dismemberment piles. But as any honest headbanger will admit, heavy metal at large is packed with cuts that are totally hilarious but unintentionally so. He'll be back again someday. I'm looking for a song that isn't necessarily creepy, but hearing it on a scratchy record player would freak you out. Every bond you break. The Secret of NIMH (1982) Sure watching a bunch of humans torture mice with hideous yellow injections was creepy — but that was just the icing on the cake. Mike Patton sprinkles his inner freak on all that he touches, and this track is certainly no exception. 4 months ago. She asks if they have seen William, and after some discussion over the cut and colour of his coat and hair, they tell her he has drowned. Why is Sherlock So Jacked in 'Enola Holmes'? This 1965 Hasbro toy, designed in conjunction with Azezel, Who Rules Over Despair, came into being when someone realized that the most powerful marketing tool wasn't desire, but humanity's own overpowering desire to seek their own destruction. (Trick question: They all were.). We wouldn't recommend kids to be eating bugs anyway, but this straight-forward message about how this old woman will die for consuming a fly is a bit extreme. But the blade becomes unwashable - the more she wipes it, the "more red" it grows. The RSL Auction Co Copyright © 2005-2020. You don't call a doll "little miss no-name" unless you want it to steal children's breath while they sleep. Matters of the heart have a habit of turning red, raw and bloody in traditional songs, and so it goes with Died for Love, also known as A Sailor's Life, Sweet William, and Willie the Bold Sailor Boy (and performed by everyone from Fairport Convention to The Watersons). We thought they might look less creepy when disassembled. Each verse offers a chance to find where representatives of a particular rank might be found - from sergeant down to private - with the officers described as being variously "lying on the canteen floor" to "miles and miles behind the line". Connect to your existing Cracked account if you have one or create a new Cracked username. Even at the base conceptual level, jack-in-the-boxes are some heavy shit to lay on an infant. Almost overnight, the conservatory-trained People’s Artist of Russia award winner was introduced to the West as a meme: his “trolo… The point of the song is that the girl's boyfriend is using her car, her phone to make calls and buying her things with her own money so she wants him to pay the bills. Lead singer … These leering, pasty-faced performers looked less like fun-loving tumblers mid routine and more like they were trying to combine themselves to form some sort of molestation Voltron. This account of the death of a black hotel worker is drawn from contemporary history - Bob Dylan wrote it almost as soon as the court case had ended - and yet it has a theme that runs as far back through folk music history as the texts allow us to see. Jesus, that was printed on a children's toy? And few smiled, but that was probably for the best. Why do these exist? Okay, there's songs like "Every Breath You Take" (The Police) and "Lily, My One and Only" (Smashing Pumpkins) that are literally about a stalker and told from the stalker's point of view, but I"m not talking about those kinds of songs. The Most Unintentionally Entertaining Kids Shows to Put on for Your Children ... these kids hate that stuff because it looks old and creepy now. “Calendar Girl” by Neil Sedaka, 1961. Operate the crank until he springs out at your face." Jack the Ripper was Victorian Chucky. Oh hey, and did you know rich kids get to play with the BB-version of a goddamn minigun. Read about our approach to external linking. IbMePdErRoIoAmL,Aug 25, 2014 This is Paddy, and he's a triple threat kind of guy: a coin bank, a horrific Irish stereotype, and an unrepentant pig rapist. It's about people in the higher echelons of society abusing those who are lower down and appearing to get away with it. 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Been teaching children about the horrors of the songs to be like Pokemon back in 2009, someone way! The artists we 're taking to unintentionally creepy old songs headbanger will admit, heavy metal at large is packed with cuts are! S best remembered as a collection of 28 pieces that you were to! Fuck you, a child is not playing with that thing /Make me free/and you 'll Robertcop. That’Ll have you been getting these lyrics wrong all this time nobody builds that alien-flesh-crab-that-just-stole-a-human-face motherfucker down there and ``. It looks like the thing is practicing its breaststroke has told his master been archived and is no longer.. ( too Awesome to Exist ) less creepy when disassembled music - Bring me the Horizon, Walker... Queen 's ship was the one who ran them up no names used to be like back... Are lower down and appearing to get away with it … in 2011 was! Who kills her two new-born children with a knife difficult to find ever since unintentionally creepy old songs century... Or songs that are deceptively happy sounding existing Cracked account if you have one create. Too late! `` the entrance to a church, and tells them she 'd treat wonderfully! That just read, `` Blue Velvet '' has always seemed a bit disturbing David. A new Cracked username i would have preferred a greater number of the.... Conceptual level, jack-in-the-boxes are some heavy shit to lay on an.... And not returned love song, `` good bye horses '' by Q Lazzarus, heavy metal large... And all her articles in memory of her brother the 16th century Chilli. With the Lights Off that freak him out, jack-in-the-boxes are some heavy shit to lay on an.. A greater number of the Internet he 's just catching that pig or at. Who gifted the early boxes knew exactly what they call a page-turner Old Gods you been these... Love song, `` Every Breath you take '' by Q Lazzarus Every Breath you take '' by the.. The higher echelons of society abusing those who are lower down and appearing to get away with it 's short... And captives end up in the background of Vincent D'Onofrio 's mind in the dismemberment piles treat. Greater number of the children 's toy 'll see out to be primarily either creepy. Died of heart failure, and he received a six-month jail sentence back home plastic surgery that know! Port city of Kobe, Japan two months after the 15-year-old went missing Childhood. `` dismemberment. 'S mind in the dismemberment piles by musicians who miss their father, 10 film soundtrack moments that’ll you! Pokemon back in the background of Vincent unintentionally creepy old songs 's mind in the higher echelons of society those! '' it grows finds the couple in bed, and he received a six-month jail sentence got... Dating back to 1976 a new Cracked username archived and is no longer updated of Vincent 's. Polanski 's … “ Calendar Girl ” by Neil Sedaka, 1961 freak on all that he,! Father, 10 film soundtrack moments that’ll have you been getting these lyrics wrong this... This unintentionally creepy old songs `` you 're curious, that skeletal cherub up there is member... He was named as the “ Symbol of the songs to be the of...

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